My grandparents are based in the same state i live. This warranted quite a lot of visits from me.
My grandmothers cooking was the main cause.
They have a big compound, such that the main house is located at one side of the compound, and the other side is unoccupied but fenced. This gives people the opportunity to park their vehicles at the side of the house.
Ever since I was a kid, we always entered the house through the back door. We were so absorbed in this habit that I wasn’t aware of the existence of the front door. In my head, the back door was already the front door. Oddly enough, I might have wondered once or twice why the front door (the actual back door) was so small, when there was a larger door at the back of the house. I didn’t realize i got it all wrong. I got it wrong for years till it occurred to me that i might have been looking at it backwards.
I tried to correct this perceptive mistake by entering the house through the actual front door, but I wasn’t able to do so. I would have reached the back door, before I realized that I passed the front door on my way.
The important life lesson i’m trying to draw out from this boring story is that perspective/perception matters, and doesn’t change easily. It is like a steering wheel, that once faulty, keeps leading you in the wrong direction. Have you wondered why violence amongst parents inspire violent acts in their kids. Genetic material only makes up half our character. Our view of life makes up the other half. The same applies to our children.
There is a saying “if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid”.